Mental Health Care in the UK is a Fucking Joke

So.. last october i suffered from bad panic and anxiety attacks. which triggered off my depression which in turn made me want to kill myself to stop the pain.. so what did i do in a moment of sanity?

I went to my doctors. what did they do?
They gave me pills that made me so sick i couldn't eat i end up missing a days work throwing up or shitting though an eye of a needle.

so 2 weeks of that what did i do next?
i went to the doctors who took me off the pills and referred me to a mental health worker. which all he gave me was this fucking boring satan awful  patronising website in the name of "CBT" i was meant to do once a week. how the fuck is that meant to help me i have no idea. got to about week 3 and it was to the stage of i cant be fucked. and a counsellor who didnt fucking listen. people who know me know i have an issue with someone uttering a certain word which causes my anxiety to go though the roof i told him not to say it and he still did. so after that what happened. i was put on a 5month waiting list for "proper" counselling 5 FUCKING MONTHS?! its just as well im not heading out the 8th floor window. but this is the ultimate pisstake..
i got a letter saying the appointment is on the 22nd of this month (today being the 20th) and i got to ring by tomorrow to confirm of cancel and did they bother to set it up at my local medical centre? did they bollocks! they set it up not only in a venue that i have to take 2 buses for and its just outside my bus pass zone. they did it in an area that i rather yank out my pubic hair with tweezers then go near. i mean wow that is treating someone with mental problems with real care. its lucky for them that at the moment im in a state of mind that is not total depression. (though you can tell from this blog i have anger issues) cos that is real class A fucking me about. anyone else would of jumped off a bridge by now.

you wondering how im coping with my mental state and depression. well i found the way is to rant on here to get things out in the open helps. giving up things that cause me to get depressed and have panic/anxiety attacks, this is the reason im STAYING single for a very long time, and avoiding anything or anyone who winds me up or tries to break my self confidence. and also standing up for my beliefs and not be forced to do anything i dont want too. basically be myself not blend into the crowd.

Scammer and Spammers YOU CAN FUCK OFF!

This is the latist one to come though my inbox

 

I mean seriously do you fuckwits think i was born yesterday. i can see a scam a mile away. So to all you Spammers and scammers let me tell you now.

If i am ill i wll go and see my doc. i dont want your fake pills that could make me worse or kill me.

If i want money i will go out and fucking earn it

If i want to have some "stewie time" oh its an 18+ blog i will say it if i want to have a wank I will search for porn. fucked if im paying for it or giving your my credit card details so you could blackmail me with it. besides how do you know im into that stuff? i might not be (cue the jokes!)

So to all you scammers spammers and well cunts of the internet. just fuck off cos I report every bit of spam to spamcop dont waste your time and dont waste my fucking time.

Annoying things the Public do on busses

..Well apart from the obvious of playing their music on their phones.. HEY ITS CALL HEADPHONES FUCKING USE EM!! now due to lovely PC rules that the liberal fuckwits have passed... I cannot  mention what group of people it normally is (or pretend to be)

But this is a list of things that really get under my skin when it comes to people travelling on a bus.

•  I put my arm out to hail a bus and then someone else does it
  Yeah look the driver is fucking blind, if s/he was then s/he wouldnt be driving a bus even by our stupid equality laws that wouldnt happen. i normally wear a jacket that has reflective lettering on so even in poor lighting they will still see me. it doesn’t need two of us waving at him/her

 

• Limited number of seats and someone doesnt move their bag or out of the way.
  Show some fucking consternation on this one. im not being sexist but it seems that women are really bad for doing this one. unless you brought 2 tickets then dont occupy 2 seats when its busy. its easy to be in your own little world but if you see the bus stop and the queue is long be prepared to give up your seat. not just for me but for anyone who wants to sit down.

 

• Pushing the bus stop button twice (or more)
  This really fucks me off one of the "bus stop button" annoyance I have ok if you did it a spit second after i did it due to slow reflex thats understandable but not after 2 seconds. in case your mutton there is a big red sign that lights up "STOPPING" so you know someone has pressed it, and if the driver has a short memory it will show on the dashboard.  

 

• Pushing the bus stop button when its the (obvious) last stop on the route..
  I mean why what’s the fucking point of doing that. the bus has to stop anyway so why press the fucking button. this is a example of stupidity in the general public. it really pisses me off is when someone presses it when your going into a bus station THE DRIVER IS GONNA STOP ANYWAY!!! what worse if 2 people do it. the only real exception to that is if the last stop on the line is not that obvious but that is rare case. if you see me on the bus and I mouth "twat" when someone does it.. that is the reason why

 

• Bringing large baggage / items on a rush hour bus
  This IMHO is the hight of stupidity why do you have to be on a bus during rush hour when there is barley room to swing a cat, lucky to find a seat and one passenger short of "Sorry Bus Full"  with a big fuck off suitcase. use your common sense on this one WAIT!! go to the pub get a taxi. because people who do this annoying act are just retards of the highest order. not only is there no room to get it on the bus. but they are a nightmare going past bumping into people when they get off the bus.

This is not a bullet point one but.. Parents if you have kids. tell them to STFU when they are on the bus esp around 5pm cos no one needs screaming kids on the way home from work!

I do need to rant. it keeps me sane.

Why did i make this blog. so i can rant its not gonna be frequent this blog is when i need to get things off my chest and into the open.

Social networks are fucking rubbish when it comes to that. why? well because twitter you can only do 140 letters so you can only short rant.. anyone who has seen my twitter will know this one i do go off on one. but facebook is worse because its full of deluded "happy go happy" cunts who tell me to "chill out" or some bollocks like that. mainly cos their reality differs from mine. again anyone who knows me and i mean KNOWS ME not just acquainted with me. knows that I have had a hard time with depression for a few years now. and the reality of someone who is depressed is not the same as the reality of someone who isnt and the person who isnt just simply refuses to see that reality. sometimes its the other way around however those on this side of the fence knows that life is shit, life sucks the only way is to do or die.

I have a long list of things that do piss me off no end. The General Public is the top of my list because of the collective stupidly of them it feels like Darwins theory on evolution doesnt apply to them cos they seem to still have the right to breed. Anyone who has worked in retail will understand where i am coming from on this one. esp i used to work for a certain Jewish company who's one flagship product contained pork, sells products from a rumoured anti-Semite forces their staff to work Saturdays. and cant accept TWIGGY SHOULD FUCKING RETIRE!!

Another think that pisses me off are cyclists who flout the rules and worse fuck all is being done. even wrote a letter to my MP and it seems fuck all will be done.  so there will be alot of rants about that.

Right any questions? no good if i have a new rant i will link it on twitter.  as i said it prob be days or weeks when i update this shit. depends on how i feel